Put A Little Peace In My Mind
by between the waves
Summary: Kate was honest enough with herself to admit when something wasn't working- she'd been staring at the same few lines for nearly ten minutes. She needed to see him for herself. Based on promo shots for 4x07.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Castle is not mine and is the sole property of Andrew Marlowe and ABC Studios. No copyright infringement is intended and I make no profit from this.

Spoilers: The pics released from 4x07 and vague mention of events from the episode summary.

A/N: Normally, I don't write for Castle very often- I'm usually quite content to simply enjoy watching the show, reading fanfics and re-blogging anything even vaguely Castle related on Tumblr. The other day, in a fun little reply to my geeking out about music in a review, Chezchuckles mentioned how great The Black Keys' Brothers album is for Castle & Beckett, specifically "Everlasting Light". Cue me- suddenly realizing it had been far too long since I last heard it and listening half a dozen times to make up for it. And then this happened. In case you were wondering, I have no idea how that particular song leads to this.

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><p><em>"No passion so effectually robs the mind of all its powers of acting and reasoning as fear." - Edmund Burke<em>

Kate found herself knocking on his door long before she could talk herself out of it. She was still working on calming the nervous flutter of her hands at her side when someone shuffled up to the other side of the door.

The idle thought that it was too late to turn around and head home crossed her mind before she remembered the day's events that had led her to Castle's loft in the first place. She stilled, looking up expectantly when the lock turned.

...

_She'd been home to change, and after the adrenalin-fueled worry of the day, she'd tried taking a bath, hoping to repair her severely damaged calm. When that failed to ease the tension that started her hands to trembling at random intervals, she'd curled up on the couch with one of his earlier novels and tried to immerse herself in the story._

_'He's alright- it's alright,' she'd reminded herself, though saying it and believing it were proving to be two vastly different endeavors._

_It had taken time and more than a few sessions with Doctor Burke, but at least she was honest enough with herself to admit when something wasn't working- she'd been staring at the same few lines for nearly ten minutes and was no closer to processing them than when she'd first laid eyes on the page. She -quite irrationally, she noted- needed to see him for herself, just to make sure._

_Closing Storm Warning gently, she stood, grabbed her keys, and slipped out the door before she could start debating whether continuing on to her destination was a good idea._

... 

The door opened abruptly and Castle stood just inside the threshold, gaping at her.

"Beckett, hi! Is everything- are you…?" He trailed off meaningfully, eyeing her as if trying to detect some heretofore unmentioned injury. It wasn't lost on her that although he'd been the one in danger today, he was currently trying to decide whether she was alright or not. After a moment, she was somewhat aware of the fact that she was doing the same to him.

"Hey, Castle. Got room for one more?" She felt a little sheepish, asking after she'd turned him down on the very same offer only two hours earlier, but he didn't seem to mind.

He swung the door open, motioning her in. "There's always room, you know that."

Her eyes dropped downwards as she grinned, like she was taking a moment to savor it before she shared the giddy, overly-relieved feeling that was finally starting to take over.

"Yeah, I guess I did."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Castle is not mine and is the sole property of Andrew Marlowe and ABC Studios. No copyright infringement is intended and I make no profit from this.

A/N: I wasn't expecting to write more of this. And yet. There should be one more part to this and then we'll be done with this little venture and I can get back to reading fanfic. -smile-

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><p>Inside, the loft was calm and quiet, and Kate looked around curiously. "Where are Alexis and Martha?"<p>

"Alexis is Skyping Ashley, she probably won't surface for a few more hours. And Mother went out on the town- 'to reaffirm her existence,'" Rick finished with a dramatic shudder. "In the interest of my fragile sanity, I refused to ask."

Kate rolled her eyes and followed Rick to the kitchen, noting the crackling flames in the fireplace that warded off the mid-autumn chill. "So you're… keeping the home fires burning then?"

"I'll have you know that I was engrossed in writing the next Nikki Heat novel," he said, nodding to the laptop which sat on the kitchen table.

Kate leaned towards it, grinning when she saw the screen. "Contemplating a change of genres? I somehow don't remember ever coming across any zombies in New York City."

Rick colored briefly, rushing to flip the screen closed before she saw any more. "Not a chance, Detective. I was merely engaging in a time-honored creative writing exercise to broaden the horizons of my story-telling ability."

"By making Nikki fight zombies... naked?"

Crap. She'd seen way more than she initially let on. He cleared his throat awkwardly, still clutching the laptop to his chest. "Yes, well-"

"Admit it, Castle, you were goofing off."

"Maybe a little." He smirked, placing the laptop on the kitchen counter.

"What'll it be, Beckett? Beer, wine? Perhaps I can interest you in some tequila? I've got fresh limes," he added, wiggling his eyebrows ridiculously.

"Shut up and get me a glass of wine, Castle."

"As you wish, m'lady," he said, and then set about procuring two of the very largest wine glasses she'd ever seen with a smirk and a flourish.

Kate's eyes narrowed. If she didn't know any better... But- _he __wouldn't, __would __he? __Well, __yes,_ she had to admit, _he __probably __would._ Considering that any response from her would lead to either a very awkward conversation or to him incessantly quoting the Princess Bride at her for the rest of the night, she let it go.

"So what brings you by? Just couldn't stay away from yours truly? I'm flattered."

"Don't be- you've got a bigger fireplace and-"

"-Is that a euphemism?" he chipped in gleefully, and she found herself rolling her eyes at his antics as she finished.

"-and my apartment's too drafty." Which was actually true- her apartment was getting chilly lately and until the super decided it was late enough in the season to turn the heat on, she was stuck using the fireplace and occasionally- though she'd never admit to it- leaving the oven open to heat the small space.

"Oh." Rick sighed, taking in the few damp strands of hair that hung loose over the long sleeves that covered her arms. "Still cold?"

"Now and then." She gathered he wasn't just talking about the present and shrugged, preferring not to think about their time in the freezer any more than was necessary. "You?"

He nodded, scrutinizing the counter as if it held the answers. "Sometimes. I turned the thermostat as high as it would go after the Hamilton case."

She offered half a smile. "I ran for an hour and still had to get the largest hot chocolate I could find afterwards."

Kate looked up and met his steady gaze, trying to appear less affected than she'd been by the day. "How are you doing?"

Rick tilted his head in an approximation of a shrug. "Oh, you know me Kate, I bounce pretty well. It wasn't my favorite way to spend the day, but it's over now. _Thank __you_."

"I didn't do anything, Castle- it was difficult even getting them to allow me on scene."

"No," he said. "Thank you for taking care of Alexis. I knew your hands were tied by the negotiation team, but thank you for looking after her."

"I promised I would, Rick." she murmured.

_Still,_ she thought. _It __was __too __close._ Kate made an effort to lift the mood and motioned at the large bottle of wine sitting forgotten on the counter. "You gonna pour that?"

"Trying to get me drunk?" He sounded entirely too delighted by the prospect

"And what would you do if I was, Castle?" _There. __Let __him __chew __on __that __for __a __while._

He poured two tall glasses, sliding one across the counter to her with a look that was equal parts dark and playful- and completely distracting, she thought. "I'd help."

Kate looked away first and took a sip from the glass she'd picked up moments before, idly thinking it was almost large enough to be considered a goblet. She could still feel Rick's gaze on her, and it wasn't that it was uncomfortable; it was that it felt too comfortable.

They'd been playing this game for months- years actually, she admitted in the spirit of being honest with herself. He pushed, she pushed back, then they met somewhere in the middle, laughed at each other, and started all over again.

Lately it hadn't seemed like as much of a game- more like something had been settled and decided upon between them without ever being voiced. They were closer than they'd ever been, and she'd been content with that for months now, ever since Castle had resumed shadowing her at the twelfth. They'd come as close to talking about the proverbial "It" as they ever had and he finally knew about the wall, which felt like a monumental achievement in itself. She hadn't talked about it with anyone but her therapist in years. Today though- it hadn't felt like enough anymore, not when she was suddenly faced with the realization that he could die whether or not he was following her. That he could die without ever knowing...

_Alexis had asked her point blank in a moment of sheer panic, "Do you love my dad?" with eyes wide and terrified and so much like Rick's. Kate hadn't been able to look away, and she hadn't been able to lie. _

_She'd nodded quietly, her own eyes a little watery. "So much."_

_Alexis had settled a little, but she still looked lost and Kate reached out, anchoring her. "I can't lose him, Kate."_

_"I know. I promise I'm going to do everything I can to get him out Alexis, even if that means I strap a vest on and go in there myself."_

_The teen had stared at her for several seconds before she nodded slowly. "Okay."_

"Hey-" Castle tapped her shoulder, abruptly bringing her back to the present where he looked like he was expecting her to startle and flee at any moment. "Where'd you go just now?"

Kate shook her head, silently asking him to let the question go unanswered while she marshaled her thoughts. He was fine. They still had time.

He watched her for a moment before he finally came to a decision. "You know what we need?"

She braced herself when she saw the serious look on his face, half-certain the next words out of his mouth would be some outlandish plan.

"Ghostbuster's marathon," he finished, a grin already taking over his familiar features. She felt a matching one spreading across her own face as she thought back to one of their most recent cases.

"Seriously, Castle? Ghostbusters is going to solve our problems?"

"Hey, don't knock the process- these are time honored methods, meticulously honed by generations of Castles-"

"-By which you mean that you nagged Alexis until she gave up just so you'd quit bugging her, right?"

He stopped abruptly but the mischievous look never left his eyes. "...Maybe. But it's guaranteed to work and I have Triple Choco-Fudge Swirl in the freezer. Plus, I'll even let you cuddle with me."

"In your dreams, Ricky."

"Always, my dear Detective."

She found herself smirking into her wine glass and blaming the warmth she felt on her cheeks on the alcohol, but- he did have her favorite ice cream, and movies _did_ always look better on the large sheet he tacked up to use as a screen... "Oh, why not-"

"Excellent choice. Hold this for me while I get the sheet?" She took the proffered wine glass and wandered over to lean against the railing at the foot of the stairs. Despite the events of the day so far, it was definitely beginning to look up.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Castle is not mine and is the sole property of Andrew Marlowe and ABC Studios. No copyright infringement is intended and I make no profit from this.

A/N: I'd like to thank all of you who have read, reviewed, and/or added this story to your favorites or alerts. Thanks for taking time out of your day to peek in on this little daydream of mine. That said, I think there might be one more chapter after all. The best laid plans of mice and men, as they say...

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><p>Several hours and two cartons of ice cream later, they had progressed from both installments of Ghostbusters to Poltergeist. While they had started out with a reasonable approximation of personal space, they had slowly migrated closer, ending up comfortably squished together in the center of the sofa by the time Poltergeist started playing.<p>

A few minutes later, a door opened and closed upstairs and was quickly followed by the sound of footsteps moving towards the top of the staircase.

"Dad?"

"Down here honey."

Kate sat up, starting to pull away when Alexis continued down the stairs but Rick's arm dropped from the back of the sofa around her shoulders, tugging her back down.

"Castle, let go."

"Quit it," he whined, tightening his grip. "I'm finally warm."

_And __he __thinks __he's __smooth._ Kate stifled her amusement but stopped trying to move away, instead pausing the movie and leaving the remote on her lap. "I'm not your personal blanket, Castle."

Rick was pouting exaggeratedly when Alexis appeared, peering down at them from behind the sofa. "Hey Dad. Uh... hi Detec- Kate."

Kate shifted uncomfortably, unsure of the teen's reaction after their earlier conversation. It had felt good to admit the truth somewhere outside the four walls of Dr. Burke's office, but it had been tainted with the bittersweet realization that although she was admitting it to _a_ Castle, it wasn't the one who most needed to hear it. The knowledge had been a heavy weight in her stomach, leaving her tense and uneasy for the duration of the standoff. For a little while, she'd truly been afraid she wouldn't get the chance to tell Castle- _no, __Rick,_ that she wanted to- that she... loved him. It had been yet another situation that caused her to wonder if she was just wasting precious time.

"Hi Alexis. A little help here?"

She motioned to where Rick still had her loosely trapped, and although it was obvious that she could get away from his grasp anytime she wanted, the whole point was that she didn't want to get away anymore. If Alexis wanted her to back off then she would do so- whether Rick liked it or not- but it would hurt.

Her partner had grown progressively more concerned about his relationship with his daughter- they'd clashed more in the last few months than she could remember in all the time they'd known each other, and Kate wasn't naive enough to believe that she hadn't played a part in it, however indirectly. If she could at least avoid contributing to any more tension between the two she'd be happy.

She was aware of Rick holding his breath behind her while Alexis contemplated their position. Finally she smirked at Kate, leaning a hip against the back of the sofa. "Yeah, good luck with that. He's stronger than he looks."

"Hey!"

"I know, right?" The ice broke and Kate relaxed back into Rick's side, sharing a conspiratorial grin with his daughter. She and Alexis had gotten used to each other when Alexis had helped out at the precinct, and later when Kate had stayed at the loft after her apartment was destroyed, but so much had happened since then that they'd lost a lot of the rapport they once had. Kate was struck with the urge to try and regain at least a little. "How's Ashley?"

"He's good, he said to say hi to everyone and that he's glad you're okay, Dad." Alexis replied, wearing the dreamy smile that seemed to be reserved for Ashley alone these days, or for thoughts of him. She paused, giving her father a serious look. "You are okay, right Dad?"

"I'm fine Alexis, I promise," Rick replied reassuringly. "Tell him hello and thanks the next time you talk."

"Same for me and the boys," Kate added.

"I will," she said brightly. "He's going to try to come out for the weekend soon."

"On my dime, no less," Rick grumbled long-sufferingly, either not noticing or choosing not to address the annoyed look Alexis shot him.

Kate dug one elbow into his side. "If you can handle the bill from the art museum, I'm sure flying Ashley out here won't hurt you- quit being such a baby."

"Thank you- Grams and I told him that, but he said we were biased."

"Of course he did."

Pointedly ignoring the by-play, Rick waved the remote gleefully."Pumpkin, you wanna join us? Poltergeist just started."

"You sure I'm not interrupting anything?" the red-head asked, raising a mischievous eyebrow at their current setup.

Kate gave her a playful glare and scooted to the end of the sofa, rolling her eyes when Rick moved into the middle after her. "Get down here Alexis. If I have to suffer through his corny jokes and commentary then so do you."

"I'm right here," Rick protested.

"Of course you are, Castle. That's why I said it," Kate shot back, patting his cheek when Alexis laughed and moved to curl up on his other side.

"Kettle corn?" Kate offered, passing the bowl she had made during what Rick referred to as a mandatory snack break after the second movie.

"Thanks." Alexis grabbed a handful to munch on. "This is really good. Dad and Grams always burn it."

"Secret recipe," Kate replied. "I can show you sometime if you want."

Alexis leaned over her father to study her, leaving Kate with the odd feeling that she'd been dropped in the middle of a test without knowing the topic or the questions.

"I'd like that." Alexis agreed, apparently having found what she was looking for and settling back in to watch the movie.

Kate was aware of the fact that Rick hadn't said much for the last few minutes, so perhaps the look on his face shouldn't have surprised her. He was watching her with a soft grin and a steady light in his eyes that she normally glimpsed at brief intervals. It had a habit of making her feel that her chest was inexplicably too small for the way her heart fluttered and her stomach filled with... something. Not butterflies. Kate Beckett _did __not_ get butterflies, though she couldn't deny there was a certain disorienting anticipation that attacked her at the oddest times when he was around.

She didn't look away, well aware that his eyes rested on her with the same warmth he probably saw in her own gaze sometimes- and which he was probably seeing at that very moment.

Something was unfolding inside her, cautious and exultant in the same moment, and the answering grin that tugged his lips upwards said there was no way he'd missed it. She was grateful when he chose not to comment.

"I'm so glad you're alright," Kate whispered, leaning in to touch her lips to his cheek before she returned to her previous position resting against his shoulder. She refused to look at him, needing the small amount of distance it provided as she quietly continued. "I hated every second you were trapped in there Rick. Alexis wasn't the only one who was terrified."

"Kate?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm going to hug you now, okay? Try not to freak out or anything."

"Oh, if you must," she teased.

His arms closed around her in an abrupt bear-hug that simultaneously stole the breath from her lungs and let her breathe easier than she had in hours. Kate found herself hugging him back immediately.

"I'm right here," he promised, holding on a little longer before they broke the embrace.

Rick trailed his fingers along the top of her shoulder and wrapped his other arm around Alexis, who let out an amused huff. Kate didn't have to see his face to know he was smiling like he'd won the lottery _and_ a Pulitzer. They'd all made it through the day, which she counted as a major win, and in the aftermath she couldn't think of anyplace she'd rather be.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Castle is not mine and is the sole property of Andrew Marlowe and ABC Studios. No copyright infringement is intended and I make no profit from this.

A/N: Alright folks, this is it for this little journey. I set out with the goal of having this finished before _Cops and Robbers_ aired, and I'm pretty happy with where it's ending. Not entirely, mind you, but enough that I can quit picking at it and move on. Thanks again to all of you who read, reviewed, and/or added this to your alerts or favorites. I've had something of a lingering paranoia with regards to writing multi-chapter fics, but there's something to be said for positive peer pressure. (smile)

NaNoWriMo is starting the day after tomorrow, so I'll be down the rabbit hole during November with the exception of regular breaks for Castle. And for my dearest friend, caffeine, of course. For those of you who are doing it as well, good luck, and if you'd like a word-war buddy, look me up! For everyone else, have a lovely November and spare a thought for us as you're falling asleep at normal hours instead of mumbling plot points at all hours of the day and night while trying to explain the sudden appearance of ninjas within your story-line. ;)

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><p>The last movie they'd picked ended as the clock's hand slipped past one in the morning, and Rick was half dozing while the credits played, head tipped back against the sofa.<p>

Kate glanced over at Alexis who was deep in thought on the other end of the sofa.

"Hey Alexis, I think we should let your old man get to sleep soon; somebody needs his beauty rest." She said, nudging him.

The red-head nodded sagely, the contemplative look that had covered her face seconds before dissolving as she prodded her father back to awareness.

He blinked at the improvised screen in front of them, still more asleep than awake. "Wha?"

"It's true-" Alexis chuckled. "He starts looking like Frankenstein's monster when he doesn't sleep."

Rick groaned and rubbed his eyes. "Clearly I'll get no sympathy from you two. I shared my ice cream for this?"

"Cheer up, Castle, at least it's the weekend." Kate peeled his arm away from her shoulders and shifted to the edge of the sofa before she lost the battle with a large yawn. "Suddenly I'm really glad I'm not on call tomorrow. I should get going."

"You want the guest room tonight?"

Kate hesitated- it wasn't an entirely unpleasant idea, especially when compared with going home to a cold, empty apartment- at any rate, it would probably do wonders for her ability to sleep...

"Thanks Castle, but I think I'll just head home, give you two a little time to decompress," she finally answered.

Rick frowned. "You sure?"

Alexis eyed her curiously, but Kate noticed the gratitude behind it. There was a part of her that wanted to take Rick up on the use of his guest room, get lost in the noise and vibrance that was the Castle household and let it soothe away the nightmares she was bound to grapple with. Despite that, she could fully understand Alexis' need to have some alone time with her dad. It wasn't even a decision.

"I am. Maybe next time though. I'll even spring for the ice cream."

"You have a deal. I'll send you the list."

_List?_ she mouthed, and then thought better of asking. It was Rick, of course he had an ice cream list. Knowing him, there was probably a detailed compilation of flavors, toppings, and mix-ins involved that she would be better equipped to deal with on a full night's sleep, or at the very least a large dose of caffeine. She found herself strangely looking forward to it.

"I can write the recipe for the popcorn before I go," she added as an afterthought to Alexis.

"Thanks, Kate."

"Ooh! Speaking of recipes-" Rick bounced off the sofa, abruptly wide awake. "I'll be right back."

He rushed off to the kitchen, leaving a bemused Kate and Alexis staring after him. It was quiet for a moment and then Alexis turned to face her.

"You don't have to rush off, you know."

Kate took in the late night quiet around them, the soft hum of electricity in the walls around them and- a loud clank sounded from the kitchen, followed quickly by a few more. She resolutely decided not to ask, instead refocusing on Alexis.

"You two need some time. Today's been... hellish," she finished with a helpless shrug. Some things couldn't adequately be described with words.

"Thank you. For getting him out safe today. And... you know."

Kate sighed, she'd been expecting to discuss this at some point ever since Alexis had joined them. "Alexis, you need to know I'd do anything to keep your dad safe. I can't-"

She trailed off, scrubbing a hand through her hair. "I don't know how to say it, he's the one who's good with words."

"You kind of already did say it, earlier." Alexis pointed out quietly. "Did you tell him yet?"

Kate leaned back again. "You know before today, I would've said that I couldn't tell him; that there's still too much I need to work through."

"And now?" Came the soft prompt from the other end of the sofa. She could hear Rick banging things around in the kitchen behind them over the sound of their own hushed voices.

"Now, I don't know anymore. You never have as much time as you think you do. _I __keep __realizing __that,_" she murmured.

"Then you're gonna tell him?"

"I-" Kate blew out an unsteady breath. "Anybody ever tell you that you're freakishly good at getting people to confess their deepest secrets?"

"My dad. All the time." Alexis confirmed with an unrepentant smirk. "You were saying?"

"I want to tell him," Kate admitted.

"Why don't you? My dad's all in, he's just waiting for you- you have to know that by now."

"I do, actually. I know. I'm- I'm going to tell him, but I can't do it tonight. No, hear me out-" she waved a placating hand when Alexis moved to protest, eyes following Rick as he moved about the kitchen.

"I don't want him to wonder if I'm just saying it because I'm scared or because it's been a crazy day and emotions are running high. I don't want him to wonder about me. I think- after all this time he deserves to _know. _I want to give him that." Kate finished, looking down at her hands.

Alexis seemed to understand that she needed a few seconds of silence to gather herself, and Kate used the time to sweep away the rubble that had once been her wall. It didn't surprise her that it had apparently been blown up- she could even pinpoint the exact moment when it had, though she steadfastly refused to let herself dwell on the sheer terror she'd felt at the time. What did surprise her was the distinct lack of panic she felt on finding the wall in such disrepair. Finally, she looked up.

"So not tonight, but soon?" Alexis clarified.

Kate nodded. "Very soon, I promise."

That got her a smile. "Okay."

The noises behind them stopped and she saw Rick making his way back to the sofa, a large Tupperware container in hand.

By mutual agreement, they put the rest of the conversation on hold. "What are my two favorite ladies discussing over here?"

"Just trying to figure out how someone can possibly create such a racket in the kitchen. It's the middle of the night, Castle."

Alexis nodded helpfully. "Seriously dad, it sounded like a herd of elephants in there. What's that?"

"Care package," he answered, passing the container to Kate. "Or an offering for your fridge-temple, if you prefer. It's the Castle family dinner sampler, edible edition."

Kate frowned. "Should I be worried?"

"Nah, Alexis and I made this stuff. It was Mother's turn night before last and fortunately she decided take-out was in order."

"Ah." Picking up her purse, Kate finally stood and made her way to the door with two Castles trailing her. "Thanks, you two."

"What about the popcorn?" Alexis piped up.

"What?" Kate blamed the late hour for the fact that it took a few seconds to process. "Oh, the recipe. Would you mind terribly if I texted it over in the morning?"

"Or you could just come for a late breakfast and show me then?" Alexis stood in front of Rick and winked at her. She was definitely her father's daughter. The pushing was all too familiar and Kate wondered what it was about this family and taking every single one of her boundaries as a personal challenge.

"I don't know if that's-"

"Oh, come on Kate, you know you want to," Rick said, already grinning delightedly. "Think of the fresh coffee. And the waffles! My waffles will be very lonely without you."

Alexis shot an odd look at her father, then Kate.

"I have no idea, Alexis," she answered. "But... the coffee does sound good."

"Fresh brewed, and as much as you want." Rick promised.

"I'm not getting up early for this, Castle."

"Breakfast is prohibited before eleven on Saturday mornings," Alexis offered, sounding for all the world as if she was quoting a rulebook.

"What? That's a thing?" Kate was torn between amusement and... something.

"Castle family rules," the teen supplied. "According to dad, it's all very serious and involves our honor as Jedi Knights. Honestly, he just didn't want to get up any earlier than he had to on a weekend."

"Not surprising, but-"

"Kate, just come for breakfast, okay? Otherwise Dad will mope all day."

"I will not!" Rick responded indignantly.

Kate rolled her eyes as yet another smile stirred and grew without her control at their good-natured bickering over Rick's sulking habits. Eventually, she waved a hand between them.

"Okay, you two. Breakfast at eleven then, but I still have to go home and get some sleep so we can do that."

"Alright. Good night Kate." Alexis waved and went to clear their bowls from the living room, leaving them in relative privacy.

"Night Alexis."

Kate moved out into the hallway, finding Rick a half step behind her when she turned. She was aware as they stood in the doorway that they were grinning like idiots and she didn't even care how it looked.

"So..."

"So." He echoed.

"Long day," Kate murmured, pretending that she hadn't seen his stealthless attempt at sneaking closer nor reciprocated with a few shuffled movements of her own.

"It was, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't like the way it ended." That honesty was what got her every time. He'd been right there beside her for the better portion of the evening, and every remark he made seemed to shine a spotlight on the smoking pile of bricks that used to be the wall.

"Is that so?"

"Yep." He leaned a little further into her space, whole, steady and alive, with those wonderfully expressive blue eyes promising he'd give her everything if she'd just give _them_ half a chance.

"And... do you think it'll get any better?" She let out a slow breath as his breathing synchronized with hers, or the other way around- she couldn't tell and it probably didn't matter.

She couldn't walk away if she tried.

"I'm not sure yet, but you know me- I live in hope."

Sometimes she didn't know how to handle the dizzying rush of feelings he provoked (_wantneedlove-stay-don'tdie_); they were overwhelming and they reminded her of being a child on the beach, her parents watching nearby while the waves crashed into and around and through her. She used to run from the incoming waves, only to dance right back into them moments later when she couldn't bear to stay away.

Sometimes though, Kate suspected that if she could just... she stopped thinking about it and swayed into him, closing the distance with a smile and delivering the briefest kiss she'd ever given. She skimmed her hands along his arms without pausing in any one place, slowly, like a tired traveler being warmed by the glow of a fire. When she reached his hands, she tangled their fingers together and met his gaze, and then kissed the smile he gave her in return because she wanted to and she could and life was short.

"Goodnight, Rick."

She hadn't thought the smile he wore could get any brighter, but it did. "Sweet dreams, Kate."

She had no desire to hide her obvious joy, and after a moment she forced herself to let go and head for the elevator before she changed her mind about staying. After all, she had to leave sometime so she could come back to them, and Kate had no doubt that she _would_ come back for breakfast and would probably get roped into staying for lunch as well, plus whatever mischief Rick managed to concoct in between. She was actually almost looking forward to one of his crazy schemes, though she certainly wouldn't share that information with him. At least not yet.

_Maybe __tomorrow,_ she thought as she stepped onto the elevator. It was looking more hopeful by the minute.


End file.
